Excerpt for Mozek: The Forbidden Knowledge #5 by , available in its entirety at Smashwords

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Copyright 2018 All Rights Reserved

Kiki Kay Lee

Cover art by: MaKayla Beineke

Mozek: The Forbidden Knowledge

Hunger Strikes

The two abruptly stopped their conversation to look up at the angry man standing before them. “Why are you yelling at him? He didn’t hurt me.”

The ginger bit her lip and spoke with a wavering tone. “Carver, you need to rest. You shouldn’t be up walking right now. I’m not yelling at him. Okay?”

The younger male chimed in. “I-I-It’s o-okay, C-C-Carver. S-She’s j-j-just l-looking o-o-out for m-me. I-I-I’ll be b-b-back s-soon.” With this said, the brunette dashed out of the house. Sarah scoffed as she gently pushed the tall man back into the room.

“I don’t want to lay down. I feel fine.” The female huffed with agitation. “What if something happens? Trevor is going to be gone for a while. If you spend all your energy quickly, you’ll die. If you are not instantly given blood, you can’t come back. I’m just worried about you.”

The 21 year-old slid past the caretaker and walked into the kitchen. The woman groaned in defeat and ran after him to find the male looking through the cabinets. “What are you looking for? I can get it for you.”

Carver sneered at the lady and took out a box of shortbread cookies. “I’m hungry.” Since the man was revived, he acted nothing like his former self. Sarah ponders if he ever will be truly

I know you are, but you can’t have anything, because it would disrupt the cycle and kill you. Let’s not obsess over that. I can’t watch you right now. I have someone else to look after. How about I put on a movie?”

The male with charcoal hair nodded, simply annoyed by the fact that the woman was still there.. Little did Sarah know that he was planning something behind her back. The caretaker did as she said and swiftly left the house.

The 21 year-old hurriedly took a handful of cookies out of the box and began shoving as many cookies he could in his mouth. It was satisfying to say the least. It felt as if he hadn’t ate his whole life

He ate all the of the cookies in the box, but was alarmed that he was still
very, very starved. His heart sped up as he developed tunnel vision. The male got all the food he could get out of the cabinets.

Chomping and chewing was instinctual even though he could not remember a time in his life that he has ever ate. There was plenty of food in the kitchen that took him 2 hours to inhale every single crumb. Soon, the cabinets and the fridge became noticeably spotless.

No matter what, the 21 year-old could not curb his clawing sense of hunger. Since all the food disappeared into his stomach, the man began to ingest tissues, Styrofoam, soap, paint, paper, and anything else he could find. It evidently became an issue once Carver’s stomach began to groan with dissatisfaction.

The male laid atop the cushions of the couch with his hand over his stomach. He was in intense pain that was symbolized by the constant gurgling within his stomach. The male became nauseous, however he could not vomit. The sickness was absolutely vile.

It was around 5:00 P.M. when Trevor arrived back at the house to find his friend asleep on the white leather couch. The brunette sat beside the other when he noticed that the other had a facial expression of distress.The younger of the two concluded that his companion was probably having a nightmare, so he decided to push on the man’s side to wake him up.

The older male stirred as he fluttered his eyelids open. “W-W-What’s w-w-with a-all the e-e-empty b-boxes in t-the kitchen?” The taller of the two gave a long grin as he patted his swollen stomach. “I ate it.”

Character Re-Examination

”W-W-W-What!? Y--You a-a-ate all o-o-of t-that!?” The 19 year-old folded his friend’s blue T-shirt up and pressed his palm over the stretched stomach that was clearly upset.

He was warned by Sarah that someone that was revived could not have any food or flavored beverage. It would cause diverse affects and disrupt the serum. He couldn’t really remember what else would happen, but he knew for sure he had to keep it a secret from his caretaker due to her always making a big deal out of everything.

“U-U-Uh…j-just s-s-stay h-h-here. I-I-I’ll g-go clean t-t-the m-mess up.” The brunette went into the kitchen and started to clean all of the packaging up. He knew that Sarah had to stay over night at the household she was taking care of, so he’ll have time to sneak a little bit of groceries in tomorrow.

Once the chore had been completed, Trevor tapped on the shoulder oh his sleeping friend on the couch. “H-H-Hey, l-let’s go lay d-down.” Carver complied and stumbled after the other into the bedroom.

The two sat on the small bed beside on another before the younger man spoke up first.”C-C-Carver?” The older man looked tired and dazed as he locked his blurry eyes with the other. “Hm?”

“S-S-So, y-you don’t r-r-remember u-uh…M-Mozek?” The male with charcoal hair gleamed and nodded. “I know that place. Don’t you own it, dear?” Trevor’s eyes snapped open at the old but new title he had heard come from the other. Could Carver be back so soon?

“Y-You’re b-b-back! S-S-So, y-y-you k-k-know w-who I-I am and w-w-who y-you are!?” The 21 year-old raised his brow as his right hand rubbed against his own face. “Yes. I remember now.I know what happened. I don’t where I am now. All I know is Mozek and Trevor Fredrick is the king. I am your…?”

The brunette excessively blinked, because he could not believe what he was hearing. It seemed like all the food that his friend had good effects instead of adverse effects. “Y-Y-You a-a-are m-m-m-my…u-uh T-Teren a-a-and m-my b-b-boyfriend.”

Carver sat up and tilted his head in confusion. “This place is not where I belong. I do not belong in your presence, dear. I am meant to stay in Mozek. I don’t know these terms you are using such as,
boyfriend. It would be in our best interest if you could send me back. “

The 19 year-old scowled repulsively. How could he not know of Earth? A few long-lasting moments passed by before the younger of the two spoke. “S-Sure, y-y-you c-come from M-Mozek, b-b-but you h-had a l-life h-h-here. Y-You’re l-life w-w-was taken a-away, b-because you f-f-fought for m-my rights. I-I brought y-you b-b-back w-w-with m-my b-blood. S-Sadly, y-you’re s-soul could not b-be r-r-restored, s-so you h-h-have most of my g-genetics and D-D-DNA. A-All I want is f-f-for y-you t-to be back. T-The t-t-true Carver, I m-miss.”

The 21 year-old swiftly shook his head with elastic force. “No. You can longer give me your blood. It feels wrong to take it from you, dear. I must go back to Mozek. I have work to attend.” The brunette’s eyes began to quickly fill with tears.

“D-D-Don’t you s-s-see!? Y-You c-c-can’t go b-back, C-Carver! T-The r-r-reason t-that you have n-n-nightmares e-every night is b-b-because t-the only p-place you can b-be is I-I-Inclur. I’m s-sorry. If I-I w-w-wouldn’t have h-h-has t-those seizures, y-y-you'd s-still be h-h-here.

Carver slapped his palm over his friend’s rambling mouth. “No! You are a god. Trevor, you can do anything. You have the power to bring my soul back. Trust me when I say, I am still in here. Kanoa lied, it is impossible for a soul to die. It only can be repressed for so long. Listen to me, I have only 30 minutes until my mentality is gone. Sarah does not want me to have food, because nutrition is the only thing that can bring me back. Before I go, tell me you understand, dear.”

“I-I u-understand.”

Communicative Structure

”W-W-Why are y-y-you so against C-Carver?” The brunette slammed his hands on the bedside table in Sarah’s bedroom, awaking her in the process. The fatigued female snapped her eyelids open as she grimaced retentively.

The ginger slowly sat up and huffed. “Hon, what are you talking about?” The boy scoffed broke his glare. “W-W-Why d-don’t y-y-you want C-Carver t-t-to be a-a-alive? Y-Y-You only s-s-seem to w-w-want h-h-him to be a z-z-zombie.”

Sarah acted nonchalant about the situation in Trevor’s view. “I do want him to be here! Why are you accusing me? I am the one that saved him. You wouldn't even know how if it weren't for me. What are you talking about? Why don’t you trust me anymore?”

The 19 year-old gritted his jaw together, risking shattering his teeth. “I-I-I l-l-let h-h-him eat. C-C-Carver’s soul c-c-came b-back for s-s-sometime. W-Why a-a-are you a-a-against him b-b-being well!?” The woman cringed lightly and patted her friend on the shoulder, before being violently swatted away.

“Sure. After nutrition is given to him, his soul will appear. Though, his mind will become obsessive to the point of unhealthiness. It is so risky. Carver can live without food. It must not be given anymore. I promise that he’ll come back without it. You have to be patient, hon.”

Trevor screeched as he clawed at his scalp. “Y-Y-You’re l-lying! I-I-I c-c-can’t even t-t-trust you. H-H-How will h-h-he b-b-become o-obsessive? O-Over what!?” The 32 year-old held her forehead in agitation.

“Please listen to me. We use to be best friends. What has made you lose trust in me? Carver will be obsessed with whomever gave him blood.. He will become so obsessed that he will not leave your side and he’ll do anything for you. You don’t want this, trust me.” The brunette’s eyes began to flow with angry tears as he dashed out of the room with no response.

What has gotten into him lately? Why is he drawn to making Carver even more obsessed? That’s not Carver. Since when has he became so selfish?

Days had went by with Trevor subtly sneaking food to his friend that was locked inside his bedroom. He wonders if maybe if his friend would be better off gone.

It’s torturous for a grown man to be locked in a room all his life. Not to mention the Indonesian is forced to have nightmares every night as well. The brunette paced unsteadily in the room, deep in thought.

Carver’s eyes followed intently on the other male. “Trevor? What’s wrong?” The 19 year-old stopped in his tracks and gazed back at the other, “N-N-Nothing.”

The older of the two stood up and sneaked his arms around his friend. “You can talk to me, dear.” Trevor made an awkward noise in response to the sudden affection he was given.

“I-I-I-I j-j-just d-d-don’t k-know w-who t-t-to believe a-a-anymore.” The Indonesian sighed and squatted slightly to link eyes with his companion. “Trevor, I cannot thank you enough for what you did. I want to repay you. I want you to know that I am yours, you own me and that I’ll do anything for you. I care about you deeply. I also want you to know that you are in control of me. My only job is to make you happy. Please, do whatever you feel the most comfortable with. Your decision is up to you.”

The younger of two felt so many emotions at that moment, but one emotion stuck out further than the rest. That is, guilt. Trevor knows what should be done. It is only selfish to keep Carver here for his own benefit. The man never will be able to experience life outside the perimeters of the house. It was unfair. Trevor Fredrick had to do what is right.

Sociable Flattery

It was 9:00 A.M. which means it was time to inject the serum into Carver. The brunette gulped noticeably loud. “U-U-U-Uhm…Sarah?” The caretaker paused in her tracks lifting the needle away from the boy’s thin arm.

What’s wrong?” The 19 year-old shifted his watering eyes back and forth between the two. “I-I-I-I-I d-d-d-don’t w-w-w-want t-to d-d-do t-t-this…a-a-anymore…” The older male’s heart dropped with a heavy thump.

“Why?” Sarah pleaded with the teenager and bit her lip in disturbance. The situation was very shocking and unsettling. “I-I-It isn’t r-r-right. C-C-Carver h-h-has to g-g-go to I-I-Inclur e-e-every night and b-b-be tortured. H-He a-a-also is locked in..in..t-t-this h-house everyday. I-I-It’s s-selfish t-t-to m-m-make h-h-him stay in p-pure a-a-agony, j-just s-s-so I-I c-c-can s-see him.”

Carver gulped with insecurity. “Listen to what you’re saying, dear. Don’t you know that I am happy if you are happy? That’s all that matters to me. If…If you want me dead, so be it. I can leave, if that’s what will make you happy.”

Sarah held back her grin and complied with a cheerful nod. Trevor jumped up, furious. “W-W-Why a-a-are y-y-you s-so h-h-h-happy b-b-by this, S-Sarah!? W-W-What a-a-are you h-h-hiding!?” The ginger threaded her fingers through her locks as she stood up and sneered with passion.

“Hon, you need to understand. You are giving someone blood everyday. Everyone existence depends on your life. Mozek wants to keep you alive as long as possible. It is simply a waste to cut your life short for Carver. He is not needed. He was only made to be your Teren and he failed.”

The 19 year-old was beyond pissed before he soon exploded. “F-F-Fuck y-y-you!” The brunette ripped all of the needles and supplies out of the female’s grip and proceeded to pull his friend out of the house and into the winter snow.

Sarah did not chase them, for she was already conducting a complex plan. Deliriously, the shorter of the two stabbed his arm with an uncleaned needle. His eyes showered with hot tears as he mumbled in exhilaration.

Bright red blood poured instantly onto the white snow as the older man held his head low in severe shock. “T-T-T-Take it! I-I-I w-w-want y-y-you t-t-to l-live!” Carver stood silent before gulping and slowly grabbing his friend’s excessively bleeding arm.

The older male took one last quick glance at the boy’s scrunched up facial expression as he brought the crimson arm up to his lips. He did as told and licked until all of the blood was cleansed off. Trevor gasped coldly at the sudden wet tongue on his arm.

“W-W-Why d-d-did y-you d-do t-t-t-that?” The male with charcoal hair tilted his head sideways. “You told me to.” Trevor nodded as he felt chills go through his spine. “S-Sarah is a-a-against u-us.T-They all a-are. It’s n-not f-f-fair. M-M-Mozek is my w-w-world. How c-c-come I have n-no s-say so? I-I-I don’t w-w-want to l-live i-in a world w-w-without m-my favourite p-person.”

Carver gave a weak smile, his eyes twinkled with delight. “Kalani is not. Kanoa has all control, because she created you. You made up Mozek in your mind, therefore it belongs to you. Kanoa is not against you, she is merely worried about the future of Mozek. I understand that I threatened Mozek’s lifespan. I have one question. Do you really need me, dear?”

The inquiry laid stagnant in the atmosphere for 4 solid minutes until the brunette spoke in a well-heard voice. “I need you more than you need me.” It was the first time Trevor had spoken in his life without a stutter to be heard. Perhaps, all they needed was each other.

Everlasting Life

In Mozek, the skies were healing whilst the reflective walls were mending. Warmth grew heavy and colour was restored. The calm atmosphere depicted that Trevor was happy, for he was determined.

Determination brought him boldness. He wanted reality to change. He was going to do everything he could do to make this happen.

The brunette walked bare-footed across the crystal clear glass. How was he going to take responsibility for his world? Kalani, his soul sister could possibly be a reliable friend.

He drew a golden portal and left to meet with his soul sister. Once he arrived, he was met with 7,2000 rabbits hopping towards his bewildered stature. The skies emitted green light whilst the floor cushioned with velvet.

The child’s place seemed rather calming for a short-tempered girl. Kalani’s pigtails bounced as she ran to greet Trevor. “Hi! I’ve been waiting for you to talk to me. I help you.”

The male bit his lip as his heart sped up. “Uhm, yeah. Don’t you think that maybe Mozek would be…H-How do I put this?” The 13 year old whimpered as she crossed her arms..

“Trevor! You came to the right place.Before I give you more facts. You must know my background. Such as, that I was created synthetically like Carver. A male and female figure is what you needed due to weak parents.”

The older of the two listened intently to the careless girl’s tune. “I am your soul sister and Carver is your guardian angel. I am in charge of giving you support and teaching you tough love. I believe that Mozek won’t last long if you lost your true love. Carver is significant in your life. Mozek needs him. I also have my own world. I’ve been reincarnated so many times. Kanoa can never die, she molds all universes together.”

Trevor’s eyes soon became polished with unnoticed tears.”What can I do to make her change her mind? Carver belongs in Mozek. Jantung has gone to hell. There is no place for him at night. “ The young female pondered for a few moments before a idea suddenly popped in her mind.

Why don’t you…make an new world?” The 19 year-old sharply gasped. “How? Can I do that?” He was completely was not prepared for such a idea. Kalani giggled before frowning playfully.

You really don’t realize how much power you have, do you? The world revolves around you. You have every right to do what you want. There is catch, though.” The brunette male sputtered and begged for directions.

“What’s the catch?” The child curled her the strands of her hair around her finger as she skipped very close to her brother. “You have to give up your physical identity. You must live as Trena. Therefore, you are another human with a new brain and heart. It can be possible.”

Th 19 year-old’s face heated instantly he began to sweat profusely. “I-If that’s what it takes then I’ll do it.” The girl with pigtails grinned widely. “So it will be. I’ll give you the steps. Whomever you want in your world, they must follow the same steps. When you awake on Earth, I’ll meet you. Yet only you will be able to see me, because I am a ghost. I will further your process from there.”

Trevor brought picked the girl up in a twirling hug as she protested angrily. “Don’t you fucking pick me up!” The male was astonished by the sudden change of mood. “I’m sorry. I was…just grateful of your help. Sorry, Kalani.”

The child fumed and shook her head with aggression. “Don’t ever touch me again. You should know that when you change, you must take into account that death will have to occur.”

Nonsensical Fit

The rain poured until it thoroughly flooded the streets. Carver and Trevor dashed until they found shelter under a bridge. It was freezing to the point that the brunette’s hand’s threatened frostbite.

The male with charcoal hair held his friend’s palms in his own in an attempt to warm them. “Trevor, why are you going through all this trouble just to save my existence?” The younger of the two cringed inwardly.

B-B-Because t-t-that’s what l-love m-m-makes y-y-you do. I-I care a-about you, C-Carver. N-N-Not to b-be selfish, b-b-but I d-don’t t-think that I c-c-could live w-without you.”

The 21 year-old shuddered as he enveloped the other man in his arms. “What’s the first step?” That was a direct question, yet the answer seemed much more complicated.

Trevor bit his lip and searched within his mind to find Kalani’s deliberate instructions. The 19 year-old wanted to make his words blunt and precise. “W-We m-m-must j-j-jump into a-a blazing f-f-fire. T-The s-smoke w-w-will c-c-carry our souls to the h-heavens. W-We m-m-must act q-quick o-once we a-a-are in b-between dimensions. T-This is w-w-when I am to c-create a p-planet of m-my own.”

Carver’s eyes popped out slightly as he distinguished what the other was entailing. “Trevor, that is what Deast did. It’s very risky, yet I understand that you are king. You are entitled to make decisions. After the rain stops, we will make a fire and…we’ll…Are you sure you want to do this, dear? You could never come back to this life just as you did in the past.”

The brunette dried his tears on his companions sleeve as he mumbled close-knitted words. “I w-want to s-s-start anew.” The decision was implement, so forth the fire had ignited.

The two held hands as they took their last breath before plunging into the burning flames. It was the end of the beginning once again. A story such as this would have to be told to the world.

Against all odds, the two souls me in calm winds. Everything blank, for there was no meaning. It between universes, it was frowned up to step out of the lines. It was instinctual for the god to create a brand new planet.

It was as if it was written within his DNA and brain waves. The transformation felt expository elastics to his body and mind. It took a toll on his composure, yet lightened the weariness of doubt. Blue and yellow light emitted portals that sang in a mute tone.

It was absolutely spectacular to create such a planet that had the potential to fix everything that was wrong. The planet lain square with disheveled patterns in outer space. To obliterate a flawless life was unintentional, yet to be forward was exactly the purpose.

So forth, a new beginning was claimed by two kings. The planet would have a name called, “Mozek”. Mozek would be unlike the original Mozek due to it’s selfless purpose. An exaggeration of intense contentment would forever be entwined with the elastic atmosphere.

The new Mozek was sucessful, yet it was an adventure for when the first king’s soul was to enter the past Mozek. It would become a senseless competition later on to see whether Carver or Trevor would get to future Mozek first.

Future Mozek contradicts the purpose of past Mozek. For, the king has taken charge and no one was to break the determination written within his DNA. Future Mozek would learn from past Mozek, understanding the errors made.

Around the Circle

Simplistic as it may be, Future Mozek stood out of the norm for a planet just born. Trevor Dane Fredrick was proud to be an attentive creator of his own world. Finally, he had the sense of pouring knowledge. For once, he did not feel overwhelmed of knowing The Forbidden Knowledge.

The mind of Mozek is complex, yet it is demonstrated in simplistic terms. For what is regained, will never be re-captured. Trevor knows all too well that the past must be forgotten.

It must be acceptable to come to terms that the future will always be one step further. Each day, each month, each year, each decade, and each century leads us to know more of the unknown. Knowledge has no limit.

Never will existence of all run out of knowledge to know.

While Past Mozek was a sphere of colours trapped in white, Future Mozek has unleashed all of the colours known to the human eye. The atmosphere is one of which is a comfortable temperature.

The scent of strawberries and the taste of milk chocolate perfume into the stagnant air. There are no winds, yet the movement is permanent. The happiness dwells in the rainbow sky as it sparkles into an abyss of content bliss.

Many will come to stay, many will come to go, and many will visit every day. Kanoa may never find out, yet if she does the end will surely come. Until then, it is only sensible to not dwell on the what the future could be and what the past was.

The best time is now, for that is all that matters now. The future will someday be the present and the past shall always be forgotten. Mozek’s moon rises with a name of Divinity. The souls of all that inhabit Mozek during slow sleeping hours are joined within one another in a promise to never hold back.

There are no rules, however, it is recommended that we all live at peace. We all have human brain’s that work differently from one another. It is a complex organ, yet a simplistic function. It is in our best interests that we train the brain in order for the outcome to be significant.

Our hearts and our brains must be at peace with one another. If not, the balance is broken. This will cause a disturbance of the whole body and must be avoided with all solutions possible. When we are in love, the hearts yearns to take action.

While the heart may want to be the leader of all actions pertaining to the human emotion of love, the brain cannot be disregarded. The balance must stay at 50/50. With such a unique emotion of love, this may be the most difficult stage a human life will go through.

As we walk through the stages of life, there may be times when we stumble, fall, and even break a bone. This could be one of the most essential lessons of all. To stop and reflect on your brain and your heart is to be a mindful soul.

Our wants and needs may get confused for each other, though it is crucial that we must be able to tell the difference. With all the knowledge that we know and that we don’t know tells us the beauty of being human. Love and peace are the two titles we must live by in order to function without human suffering.

The story of Trevor and Carver are forever linked to one another in the sense that one has the heart and one has the brain. These two men will forever demonstrate their everlasting love for one another by containing a balance within the relationship. Reality and fantasy may sound opposite, yet they are the same.

Rein of a New Empire

It was unrecognized how much time had passed on future Mozek, but surely it was well worth it. Trevor lain on a flurry of soft ice, his skin sizzling at the contact. Today would be another lazy day for him. This boy was finally at peace with himself and at peace with knowing The Forbidden Knowledge.

The only thing that changed over uncounted time was the distance kept between Carver and Trevor. It had been an ungodly amount of time since the two had came into contact with one another, but this could be no harm, right? The brunette sniffled a tad at the sudden realization that he had grown apart from his best friend.

What had changed? It possibly could be all the stress on a 19 year old from holding up a whole world all by himself. If he was to be labeled a god, then he surely must act as such. Though, why suddenly has he grown disturbingly distant from the one he cared about the most?

None of this was adding up to the new god, Trevor. The 19 year-old bit his lip as he anxiously drew a portal from his third eye. He needed to figure things out. This is all was too much to handle for one person!

Trevor gulped soundly once he arrived in Mozek to find his former planet shredded to pieces of reflective glass. It wasn’t like this when he fled. It was deathly quiet with the only noise being the echo of his own hitched breathing. “H-Hello? Daren? Kanoa? Anybody?”

The only reply the brunette received was his own desperate screeching echo within the dark vortex of past Mozek. Where was everybody? Trevor would never admit it, but he was slowly refraining from the title of a god.

It was too scary, confusing, and stressful! Everyone on his planet relied on him. It was getting to be too much to handle. All the man wanted to do was go back to being merely a human. If only he could do just that, then maybe Carver would not separate from him any longer.

It was truly embarrassing to admit, but deep down, Trevor missed Daren, Kanoa, and Sarah. Although, the damage they done was life threatening to all of existence of mankind, they were his friends and friends should never be left behind. Just as this sudden thought appeared in the depressed male, a distant familiar voice erupted from the shards of dark glass in the distance.

“Trevor? What are you doing here? I thought you were never coming back.” It was the dreaded voice that urged the young male to repel back to his home. It seemed as if a frog was lurched in his throat as he vacantly swept all crevices of the scene.

Trevor gasped intrusively as he was soon met with drained ivory eyes of the former queen of Mozek. “H-H-Hi, Kanoa. Uhm, I just-what-well-I-I U-Uh…” The 19 year old was surely not fit to be god, for he could not stand up to his past demons.

“I’m sorry, Trevor.” Why was Kanoa apologizing so quickly? It was never expected by the man, but nothing ever was. “I made a mistake. Even gods and queens do. You had the right to know, I only prohibited this because I knew you weren’t ready for the title of a god. You’re still young. I just want you to live a normal life. You’ve never gotten the chance to live a full life.”

How could someone that hasn’t saw him in mere decades know exactly what was going on inside his head? How could she put all that he feels into words so easily? The trust Trevor had with Kanoa had depleted so quickly, yet why has his trust amplified over uncounted time?

“I’m sorry too, Kanoa. I came here, because…well, I…I feel lost. I didn’t understand all of the things that came with being a god. I feel as if my my relationship with Carver and the others have well…I don’t know. It’s strained, I guess.”

The 72 year-old crossed her arms and gave a deep sigh inward. “What’s really wrong, Trevor?” The brunette sneered as he looked at his broken reflection on the ground. “I don’t who I am anymore.”

Lost time

On Future Mozek, Carver searched everywhere he could for his lost friend. The 21 year-old was telepathic, he knew everything that Trevor was thinking and feeling. He knew of the lost time that Trevor yearned for, but he only did so to benefit his friend.

Some of the most beneficial outcomes, are the most painful. Carver’s friend needed time to find himself. Though, as much as knew, it hurt him even more. They needed each other, whether it was a dream or not.

The man with pitch black hair knew where his friend went, he knew it would lead to a destructive path. Though, he had to respect the god’s decisions, but why does Trevor cause harm to himself unknowingly? It wasn’t like he could go to past Mozek now, only the god had the ability anymore to jump from world to world or universe to universe.

Carver Hadi would quickly admit this wasn’t healthy for himself either. All he wanted to do was hold Trevor in his arms once more. Could this ever be possible again? The male with charcoal hair simmered with anger and immense worry for his counterpart.

Trevor going to past Mozek would bring out all of the boy’s past demons. Though, it had to be done soon, it wasn’t the time to do so. The 21 year-old knew for a fact that his friend was never ready to be a god, he’s merely 19 and never got the chance to live a full human life.

What would it be like if everything in the past happened differently? Would Carver and Trevor still share a mutual bond? Would Mozek still be divided into the past and the future? Would Trevor be sincerely at peace with himself? If only he could go back to the lost time, and discourage these things from happening, then maybe all would be well with the world.

A bright golden light soon abruptly appeared right in front of Carver’s vision. The radiating vortex opened up slowly, revealing two people. Trevor and…Kanoa. “O-Oh my- Trevor! Where have you been!?” It was common practice for the 21 year-old to pretend as if he didn’t see where or what happened in his mind’s eye.

The brunette had glazed eyes, appearing to be tired and worn out. “Carver, I need to talk to you…privately, please.” Trevor should know by now that nothing was private with him. “Why is Kanoa h-here? What’s going on?”

The 19 year-old tilted his head to the right, signaling for them to leave the female’s presence for a moment. The older man did as so and they walked for miles upon the blades of smoking blue grass. Carver knew all the thoughts racing within the younger male’s brain at the moment, but he wished to hear the other voice them in words of his own.

They were soon halted to a stop in the middle of hill of red ice as the skies peaked into a shield of rainbow rays. “I can’t do this anymore.” Trevor refused eye contact with his once close friend. It broke the the man’s heart to see his lover look so broken that he couldn’t at least share much needed eye contact with him.

“Do what, dear? Are you okay? Is it something I did? I can fix this. What’s going on?” The brunette sniffled as he soon made the decision to glance into cobalt blue irises that stared intensely upon him. “I don’t want to be a god anymore. I can’t take it. I need help. It’s too much…all on my own.”

This was when Carver grinned slightly, recognizing the thoughts he had heard within his friend’s mind finally grown their own voice. “I know. It’s going to be hard, but I can help you. That’s what I’m here for. I’m sorry I left you cold, I thought that’s what you needed to find yourself, but I realized that you do need me and I need you, Trevor.”

Trevor was not use to hearing his name coming from the other’s lips as this jolted him into the present. “Can we…Are you…I-I brought Kanoa here. She said she’s sorry, I…uhm…” The 21 year-old’s heart leaped to find out what his friend was just about to say.

Sure, there are many perks of being telepathic, but it does come with the frustrations of not hearing the thoughts being spoken out loud, thus never initiating what needs to be done. Carver gnawed his teeth into one another, breaking his personal rule. “Yes, we can.”

The brunette was thrown into a violent and awkward coughing fit.“Oh! I forgot!. You’re…You know…I forgot you’re…you know what I’m thinking. I can’t believe u-uh. I’m sorry! I’m so forward. I just wanted to because…well…I…” Trevor never expected for his lover to kneel on one knee and lightly clasp his fingers.

The teary and wide eyes of both companions sent a a peak of electromagnetic force through both of their spines. Carver gazed longingly up at Trevor and said the most surreal words he had ever heard come from the man’s lips. “Will you marry me, Trevor?”

Sheepish White

Mozek’s moon, “Divinity” was set in the lonesome, kaleidoscope sky. The tune of ringing bells sounded in everyone’s mind. Two men stood, facing one another as they clasped each other’s hands.

The names of the two men were Carver Hadi and Trevor Fredrick. This is the sacred night in which a god will marry his Teren (guardian angel). The two men wore off-white tuxedos, both hearts pounding against the thick fabric.

With Daren being Carver’s best man and Kalani being Trevor’s maid of honor, the wedding was almost dreamlike, yet real at the same time. Kanoa proposed the wedding vows before blessing the marriage in the name of the Lurin. The 21 year-old gulped soundly as his hands became increasingly clammy.

“I, Carver, take you, Trevor to…to be my…husband, my partner in the afterlife and my true love. Forever will I cherish our unity and forever will I love you more each day than I ever did before. Forever will I trust you, forever will I respect you, and forever will I laugh with you, cry with you, and love you loyally through the good and the bad, regardless of the obstacles that we may face together. I give you my hand, my heart, and my love for all of eternity.”

The brunette began to emotionally tear up as he spoke of his vows to his lover. “C-Carver, with all of my love, I take you to be my husband. Forever will I love you through the joy and the sorrow. I will try my best to be understanding and to trust in you completely. Together will we face all experiences and share one another’s dreams. This is my sole promise to be your partner in a loving, honest relationship for all of eternity.”

The two men tried desperately to maintain eye contact, yet with all of the attention of the cheering crowd, it was undoubtedly overwhelming. Kanoa grinned widely as she spoke with a soft tune. “ Do you, Carver Hadi, take Trevor Fredrick as your husband to cherish and love for all of eternity?” The male with charcoal-colored hair nodded urgently. “I do.”

“Do you, Trevor Fredrick, take Carver Hadi as your husband to cherish and love for all of eternity?” Trevor’s heart rate exhilarated as he said the famous words. “I do.” Once the rings were traded, the two newly-weds embraced a passionate, yet soft kiss on one another.

Once Carver and Trevor were married, all seemed to finally click within the 19 year-old’s brain. He felt over-joyed to finally mend the once broken bond between him and his best friend. To have someone help rule Mozek was exactly what he needed at this time. To feel understood and loved by the man he cared for the most was a treasured experience that he didn’t know he could miss until he lost it.

Death of a Past

Past Mozek would be left to die in the spacious universe whilst future Mozek would be built to thrive. While all seems perfectly well in Mozek, Trevor’s brain still feels haunted by his past. He wanted to live on Earth again.

Just another chance is all he needed and wanted. Since he was a god, could he go back? The brunette huffed, crossing his arms in intense agitation of the situation. The truth is; Trevor knows merely a third of The Forbidden Knowledge.

It wasn’t ever fair! He was a god, a king, yet he will always be the last to know anything! With his back to the rainbow-lit skies, the man jumped when a set of hands clasped onto his waist, pulling his body into the arms of his lover.

“What’s wrong, dear? Why do you want to go back?” Give it up to Trevor for falling in love with a telepathic person. The younger of the two was a stubborn man. He never wished to display any of his feelings to anyone, let alone a telepathic that already knew!

“Talk to me, Trevor. You don’t confine in me as much as you use to.” The 19 year-old pouted as he pulled away from his companion. “Can life exist without me?” The Indonesian roughly sighed as he lain his palm on his friend’s shoulder. “No.”

The younger of the two became angrier by each moment that passed. “I want to live again!” It was obvious that Trevor had a short temper. Carver furrowed his brows and grimaced at the situation. How was he suppose to tell Trevor that if he were to live on Earth once again, that all of the occupants of Mozek would be demolished?”

“Dear…please listen. Going back could cost Mozek’s life. Mozek is held up by your very existence. I understand, but what’s gone is gone. You can’t just throw away the afterlife for your own. To live on Earth is amazing, but Mozek needs you. You’re king after all.

The 19 year-old gritted his teeth. Deep down, he knew it would be a selfish act. “I don’t care.” Carver’s heart dropped as he realized the person he loves had changed dramatically after been given the crown of Mozek.

“Trevor! Do you know what you’re even saying?” Trevor glared up at his friend with a foolish smirk, before gradually drawing out dramatic tears from his eyes. “I can’t deal with this anymore!” I just want to be normal. I don’t want to be king. I don’t want to be a god. I want to be a human. I want to forget my past. I want to start over new. I’m sorry, Carver, but I give up.”

The sobbing brunette began to open a golden portal that would soon lead his back to Earth. Without Trevor’s knowledge, Carver jumped in the glittering portal after him. With this one action; Daren, Sarah, and Kalani’s very existence would be demolished.

Reckless Arrival

The sun rose in a melancholy manner. The high-pitched chirping of birds singing in a rhythmic tune could be heard throughout the town. A 19 year-old boy lain in his basement, ashamed of everything he had just done.

He held his palms over his ears in an attempt to block out the manic laughter coming from his mother upstairs. Little did Trevor know that he was thrown into the dreaded past he once had. It was a sad reality, yet everything done always comes along with consequences.

Trevor Dane Fredrick was put back into the world he once ended long ago. Deep within his soul, did he know that he was the one that caused this. Deep down, did he know that he deserved this natural act of karma.

It was regretful to say the least, yet it was only made sense to breathe in the bitter scent of punishment. “I-I-I’m a f-fuck up.” The brunette mumbled into his arm as he sniffled obtrusively.

There was no more Sarah. There was no more Kanoa. There was no more Mozek, even. Worst of all, there was no more Carver.

How could he just throw away the souls of his friends so foolishly? Were the stresses of being a king so difficult that he would rather choose to give up with little to now warning? Trevor knew he was disgrace to humanity.

The brunette cleared his throat, wiped away his tears, and got ready for work. What this hopeless man didn’t know was that Carver still existed, somewhere, somehow. The 19 year-old sat at his desk as he answered calls and put up a facade in order to maintain his job.

It was a day the same as any other. The atmosphere was mix consisting of false happiness and boredom. On this dreary day, his boss came to him with a proposal of coaching a new employee. Something fragile broke on this day when he was soon met eye to eye with his past.

The mindset that Trevor had for the four months that he had returned to his past were brighten by an angel of blue. Carver had refused to break the promise that he would be with him for all of eternity and for worse or for better. The art of true love became abundant within the two’s stare-down of disbelief.

The taller man was the first to speak. “You can’t get rid of me.” Trevor’s heart steadily pounded against his chest bone. The monotone voice of his former lover gave him an unbearable sense of uneasiness.

The brunette faltered and huffed mockingly, “W-Why a-a-are y…you h-h-here?” It seemed once again, that a delicate bond broke between the two. All they were was cold to one another. From the outside looking in, it was relevant that the two could not stand each other.

“Because, I love you. Is it so hard to accept that I would do anything for you. What you did was terrible, but that doesn’t change the fact that I still love you…dear.” The younger man bit his lip as he trailed his watering eyes toward the floor. “U-U-Uh…let m-m-me s-show…show you a-a-around.”

The days and the nights passed slowly without Trevor committing to his past relationship with Carver. This broke the 21 year-old, for he hadn’t known what he had done wrong to receive nothing from his former lover. To suddenly be treated as a stranger by his former lover was worst than the Inclur. For, this was far more painful than any other torment known to man.

On a Saturday evening, a light knock was sounded from outside of the basement door of Trevor’s house. The brunette clenched his eyelids together, expecting his mother’s voice. “It’s Carver.” The 19 year-old gasped gently before re-positioning himself on his mattress.

Carver opened the wooden door and cautiously walked inside. Trevor started to sweat profusely as he quickly broke his eye contact towards his friend’s chest. The 21 year-old sat on the mattress next to the panic-ridden boy. The two stared ahead with their eyes glazed over.

“Please…talk to me, dear.” Trevor grew more uncomfortable by each second that passed. “W-W-What do…d-do I say?” The older man abruptly sighed as he shifted his body toward the other. “I want to hear your voice. I jumped in the portal after you. I saved the afterlife of Sarah, Daren, Kalani, and Agnes. They rely on Jantung. You did so much for me, there was no way I could leave you all alone.”

The brunette’s face bloomed a deep shade of crimson. His heart beat to an alarming rhythm. His jaw clenched as he mumbled the dire words. “I can’t do this anymore.”

As Carver grew increasingly confused by the statement, Trevor knew he had to finish what he started. “I…I can help you. What…what can’t you do?” The 19 year-old molded his hands into fists. He hated when Carve acted as if he wasn’t already reading his mind!

“E-Everytime I l-l-look at y-y-you, I s-s-see my p-past. I-I-I can’t c-c-continue this. All…all I w-wanted was t-t-to s-start over n-new. Y-Y-You’re a-always every…everywhere I go a-a-and I-I just want to…to be a-a-alone!” The older of two gasped he heard the horrific words grow their own voice. “You don’t mean to tell me…Trevor, please don’t do this. I can’t…”

Trevor was quick to initiate technicalities. “I’ll…I’ll a-a-always love y-you, like I-I said. But, I-I-I can’t h-handle b-b-being reminded…r-reminded of M-Mozek, when I g-g-gave you life. I-It’s all t-t-traumatizing. I…I j-just w-w-want to be human a-and nothing m-m-more. I’m…I’m…sorry, C-C-Carver.”

Carver sucked in his desperate pleas and unwelcomed tears. “If I’m that much of a burden to you, I’ll go.” Once the male with charcoal-colored hair exited the room, Trevor could not help but realize that he may have made the biggest mistake.

Escape Artist

Crying himself to sleep, Trevor dozed off into a similar dream. A pastel mist collided with the dazed reflective mirrors. It was cold, dark even.

Mozek was destroyed by the god, himself. He fails at being a human. Why did everyone put so much faith in him that he could be king? Discovering that he was worthless was no new, for he knew since his first life born.

Within a holographic dream, a false picture of Carver stood. He mouthed the words that Trevor so desperately wanted to hear. “I love you.”

In this dream, the brunette could do anything imaginable, but it didn’t exist like it did before. He yearned to change his decision, yet it was too late. It was always too late.

“I’m sorry.” Trevor begged to the hologram, noticing a quick glitch in the system. False Carver forgave him, but the true Carver would never be seen again.

Kalani came to him in his dream. He pigtails bounced as she was soon to drown out the silence. “We need you.” The 19 year-old knew it was another lie he told to his subconscious.

The girl pouted dramatically as she crossed her arms. “I came from Jantung. You can fix this.” Though, the boy would not believe anything in his own world. Mozek merely stands still within his own mind. The suffering of his would shown through the condition of the planet.

“You’re not real. You’re just a hologram I created for an asshole like me to feel less lonely! I’m a nuisance. There’s no end to anything!”

The abrupt shove the girl inflicted upon the man gave him the slightest hint that maybe she was telling the truth. “Kalani?” With Trevor’s physical body sleeping on Earth, he felt more awake than ever within his dream.

The 13 year-old prodded. “Yes, you dimwit! It’s dangerous for anyone to venture off into other universes, but here I am!” The male shuffled backward as he cringed involuntarily. “Why are you here?”

Kalani molded her hands into fists and let out a long sigh. “Look, I’m trying to be nice. You screwed up big time, man! You’ve broken Carver’s heart, literally. Jantung is lifeless because of you and to top it all off; he’s still obsessed with a maniac like you!”

The man grimaced as flowing hot tears streamed down his face. “I didn’t mean it, okay? It’s stressful! You don’t know what it’s like having humanity’s fate in your own hands! I know good and well that I’ve ruined everything. I’d…I’d do anything to get it back.”

The child smirked, crossing her arms. “Come to Jantung. There is still a chance you can make some things right.” The two then fled through an emerald Sani (portal). Throught the brightly-lit tunnel, they arrived in Jantung.

Guilt Trip

Blood kissed skies and melted black grass led Trevor to repel. “Why does Jantung look so different?” Kalani urgently answered. “This is what a broken heart looks like. Since you demolished our existence, Carver saved us. Little did we know that you were going to ruin Jantung too!”

The man felt disturbingly guilty that he had caused all this damage to Carver’s world too. All he wanted was a break, not the end of the world. Doesn’t anybody get it? It’s tiring to be responsible for everything!

“I know what I did. If I caused all this, I can fix all this.” The female led Trevor to a group of familiar souls, all whom were very ashamed of what he had done. Daren, Sarah, Agnes, and Kanoa stood tattered and angry. Carver was no where to be seen for miles.

“Guys…I’m sorry. You must understand. I’m one person. I can’t do this all by myself.” Kanoa smiled with a sad tone. “You didn’t have to. This is why I ruled Mozek for so long. I knew you wouldn’t be ready this early. I don’t think you really understand who I am, Trevor.”

The 19 year-old bit his lip as he asked for the once forbidden information. “Who are you?” The former ruler of Mozek was pleased to answer.

“I created everything. I created you to be a god one day. All of these people, I created to benefit you. The most significant person I created to benefit you was Carver. I built him to love you unconditionally, to give you guidance, and for you to maintain sanity. I feel that you must know this knowledge so you can fix this. Only you can fix this. Trevor.”

It was a lot to take in, but it made perfect sense. There was still forbidden knowledge that he didn’t know and that’s okay. He was in charge of fate and he needed to prove this to himself.

Could things go back to the way they were before? He had help. Trevor has the power to change the world and for this, he will do so. He wanted Carver back more than he ever wanted him before. Though in charge of Mozek, he wasn’t in charge of people.

“Uh, where’s Carver?” Sarah shuffled her feet as she lain her palm on the king’s shoulder. “ I don’t think…you guys should converse with each other for a while, for your own sake.” Though brutally offended by the statement, the man could not help but to subconsciously agree.

Yet, anger took charge of the man’s actions. “I said; where…is…Carver!?” The group glanced at one another, suspiciously. As the silence remained stagnant in the atmosphere, Trevor grew increasingly worried for his lost friend.

“I’m tired of everyone hiding things from me! It’s getting old! Tell me now or I’ll… I’ll…” Daren cleared his throat before stepping closer to the 19 year-old. “He’s not in Jantung, because he’s still awake. He refuses to sleep for fear that he’ll see you again.”

This obliterated Trevor’s soul. To think he caused all this in the name of selfishness was too much to bear. Without any final words, the king fled through a golden Sani (portal).

Dangerous Love

Carver sat at his kitchen table, drinking coffee and fighting sleep. It had been a week since he did rest. It has seem to finally take a toll on his brain.

A quick and obnoxious knock alerted the man out of his sudden daze. Due to his severe sleep deprivation, he knocked over the chair as he stood. After yelling obscurities to his clumsy posture, he opened the door to reveal his nightmare.

Trevor grinned nervously as he awkwardly waved to his former friend. “H-H-Hi, Car…ver. U-U-Uh, I-I…” The Indonesian grimaced as he massaged his temples. “What do you want?” The brunette never thought he lived to see the day that Carver would actually be mad at him.

“I-I-I’m s-sorry. I m-m-made a…a mistake. C-C-Can’t y-y-you f-f-forgive me?” The older of two motioned for the other to come in. They both sat at the kitchen table in a stare-down.

I always forgive you, Trevor. I know it’s hard for you and you won’t ever let me help you. Have you ever thought what it’s like to be synthetically built for one sole purpose and that is, for someone else? Or, are you so full of yourself that you can’t even conceive the idea of what it’s like for me?”

The shorter of the two gulped soundly. What Carver said hit him through the heart, because whether he wanted to admit it or not, it was true. “C-Carver…p-p-please…”

The male with charcoal-coloured hair sighed, refusing eye contact. “Long ago, before you knew me, I knew you. When I was created, I was built with internal information about you. I knew more about you than about myself. From my brother’s DNA, I was built with one purpose. That is, to look after you. I grew obsessed with the thought of you, because that’s how my brain was built. When I first met you, I became even more obsessed with all that is you. Since you left me, it’s gotten worse. I was made with the brain of obsession and now my only purpose for you is unclear.”

Trevor was shocked with awe. It was true, he was piece of shit for making Carver like this. “C-C-Carver, I’ll…I-I’ll do a-a-anything t-to get you…you b-back. I-I-It was a m-m-mistake I-I made in…in t-t-the m-m-moment. A-All that…that I-I am t-t-to you, y-y-you are t-to m-me. It’s n-n-not one…one-sided. I n-n-need you.”

The older of the two glanced down at his feet, deep in thought. The 21 year-old was silent, his sleep deprivation controlled his actions. Carver abruptly lifted the other boy up by the torso and carried him into his dimly-lit bedroom. The brunette screeched in bewilderment of the sudden odd behavior of the other.

Thrown onto the bed, the younger of the two gawked up at the other’s foggy state. Slowly tears began to excessively fall from the older male’s eyes. “Just say it already!” The other male cringed as wet tears fell on his cheek from his friend above him.

“S-Say w-w-what? I-I’m s-s-sorry!” Trevor bit his lip as his heart beat heavily against his chest. He’s never seen his best friend so upset before.

“Say you hate me! I know you’re thinking it, Trevor! You hate me! You hate me!” The younger man lain in shock of how crazed Carver had become. “You know I’m not thinking that! I don’t hate you!”

The man with jet black hair stood, digging his nails into his own arms as he paced in circles around the room. “Then, why do you torture me like this? Why can’t you…Why can’t you love me?”

The older man sniffled abundantly as he shrieked. Trevor took a shallow breath in as he made the rash decision to stand up and catch the ranting man in a thin kiss. After violently shoving the brunette back onto the bed, the taller of the two lain his palm over his mouth and widened his bloodshot eyes in pure astonishment. “C-C-C-Carver! I-I-I said I-I’m sorry! W-W-W-What more d-do you n-n-need? I-I m-m-made y-you like t-this and I’m…I’m s-s-sorry, but please j-j-just for-forgive me! I-I-I k-k-know it w-was a dick move and I d-d-didn’t m-mean it!”

Carver pushed down onto the brunette’s shoulders as he soon sloppily lain kisses on the other. The two passionately, yet roughly kissed for minutes at a time. Once they both broke apart to breathe, the 21 year-old was the first to speak. “Don’t leave me. You’re all my thoughts.”

Awakened Life

After the two fell asleep on Earth, Trevor arrived in Mozek whilst Carver arrived in Jantung. There was still a thick barrier that broke the ability to venture from Jantung to Mozek. Though since Trevor was a god, he could go where he pleased.

It was the king’s decision to open a sparkling, golden Sani (portal) from his mind’s eye and travel to his friend’s world, Jantung. When he arrived, it wasn’t as chilling as it had been before. In fact, the temperature was lukewarm and the atmosphere was blinding.

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